Cracklin' Rosie Get on Board

"Oh I love my Rosie child,
She got the way to make me happy---"
(Neil Diamond)

I heard this song on the radio while jogging this morning. You better believe that it made my steps quicken. A huge smile broke onto my sweaty face, and I had to try not to giggle out loud. Do you guys do this.....make random/totally stretching connections with completely non-spanko-there-is-no-possible-way-to-make-this-a-that's-what-the-spanko-said-joke or song? Well, to explain my crazy mind, it was the "CRACKLIN'" part that got me going....and then the "ROSIE" part. Anything that is "cracklin'" on something "rosie" is quite alright with me, and it is "the way to make me happy---" I don't think I'm that crazy, do you?

This is going to be a Bonnie-jo makes 2 wierd connections at work blog.

I work at a clothing store, and about the second or third day of my first week, I was called into the security room--you know, the one with all the cameras--to do a quick orientation with the security guard working at our store. I sat at a small table, freaking out inside that I was in a dark, closed-in room, all alone, with a police officer. How lucky can a girl get? On the outside, though, I was the professional employee.

He shook my hand, and right away I knew he had that anti-social cop, awkward thing going on.

"You're not in trouble," he warned me. "The last girl I had in here got really scared. She thought she was in trouble or something."

"Ahhh..." I smiled. "No, of course not. I know I'm not."

"I've been working at this company for the last 5 years," He beamed. "See, it says so on that certificate by the door."

I craned my head to look.

"Just underneath the handcuffs." He directed.

"Oh. Yes. I see them...I mean, I see it, yeah, cool."

Suffice it to say, my day was made. It was a real pair of handcuffs....I resisted the urge to ask to touch them....

And item number two:

A couple of days ago, one of the managers/leads at my job called me over. I  have liked this girl from the moment I saw her. Tall, slender, short black hair, and  dark eyes...she had an edginess that I always admire. I learned later in the breakroom that I admire her personality too. She reminded me of the type of girl I've imagined My Magician's former spankee is like--my only contact being her blog....

"I'm a smart-ass..." This manager grinned at me. "I try to keep a lid on it, but I think people should just be brutally honest. I always say, why lie when the truth is so much more fun?" And later as she told me about her mom with cancer and her grandma that is still alive, "We always tell people that God's not ready for that much onery-ness in heaven yet. He doesn't want to have to deal with them. Not quite yet. Too onery."

Anyway, so this girl-crush of mine walked up to me the other day, and cautioned me on a couple of things I needed to focus on for work that day. That isn't the important part. The important part is that she had a long 6 by 14 or so flat piece of plastic in her hands as she told me about my duties for the day. Distracting.....At one point she looked down to see what she was holding...Actually, I didn't notice that she was holding a paddle-like object until she herself looked down and explained, "The only reason I'm holding this is because I tripped on the thing."

"Oh." I smiled. May be it was my fault you tripped...maybe you should do something about this....

But she didn't read my mind and walked away. I watched her walk, however, and my effort was rewarded, for she slapped her palm once with the offending object. I saw it with my own eyes!